继续奋斗，I'M NOT ALONE

上星期上完夜班这个星期又要上早，真TMD不把本大小姐当人来用……以至于天天早上起床都是激烈的思想斗争，周末也是睡到中午浪费了大好时光，身体的脂肪含量已经完全刹不住车。现在看镜子里穿短袖的自己真的是吓死人，那上臂就像是麦兜他师傅的脚瓜那么粗！实在是无地自容啊……朋友喊我去炼热瑜伽，自己嫌麻烦不想去再说脊椎不是很好不敢乱来。唉，年纪轻轻就觉得一身病痛，老了都不知道怎么度日，看来人太懒了还是不好，现在就差点毅力（我一向都缺少这玩意）每星期去游泳了。

 

PS：国嫂要结婚了？！真的是惊喜啊，不过自己身边的朋友都是适婚年龄不由感慨岁月无情啊……我脑里还是当年自习课上互相打闹、传阅漫画小说的美妙光景，现在不知不觉都已经10年了，80后的时代已过了……

没想到又一年了，2008年对中国是不平常的一年，对我这个小我来说也是。奶奶去世的消息，家里人瞒了我半年……虽然早有感觉奶奶已经不在了但是因为害怕而卖友追根问底，妈妈的闪烁其词其实就已经是个暗示了。虽然最后知道的时候心里多少也有了准备，但是还是痛苦，世界上又少了一个疼我爱我的人……但是就像爷爷走了那年，我给家里的家书上写的一样，现在我对于死亡已经无所顾忌，没有了恐惧，只是觉得那将是一片祥和安宁，起码，至少，我相信死后的世界里有我爱的人和爱我的人在那里。好了，不伤感了。

 

但是也没有什么值得庆贺的，我在这里还是一如既往的无所作为，麻木度日，没有什么值得高兴的转变，我自己也感觉到了一种腐朽的气息心里冒了出来，难道真的要像大文豪鲁迅先生所说的“不再沉默中爆发就在沉默中灭亡”？？深深地觉得自己应该做点什么改变现状，但是却没有那个毅力。唉，现实的无力……

 

ANYWAY，祝福我所有的朋友都能在牛年里身体健康，顺顺利利，合家安康

 

实在是不知道要说些什么了……

FOR A LONG LONG TIME SINCE LAST TIME I UPDATED MY BLOG. NO MUCH INTERESTS NOW FOR EDITING MY SPACE. THINGS ARE NOT GOING SMOOTH MAYBE THAT'S THE REASON I AM NOT FEELING HAPPY :( WORK IS SO BORED AND NOTHING EXICITED, PROBLEM IS I ALWAYS FEEL BEING LOOKED DOWN BY MY COLLEAGUES THEY DON'T TRUST ME AND THEY DONT APPRECIAT MY EFFORTS AND TAKING CONSIDERATIONS OF ENGLISH BEING MY SECOND LANGUAGE (IN MY CASE, IT MAY BE THIRD LANGUAGE) MY BODY CLOCK IS COMPLETE A MESS, I WAS REQUIRED TO DO DIFFERENT SHIFTS , SOMETIMES STARTS AT 7 FINISHES AT 4, SOMETIMES STARTS AT 2 FINISHES AT 11 AT NIGHT. I DON'T GET ANY JOB SATISFATION FROM MY CURRENT JOB BUT LIFE NEEDS TO BE CARRIED ON AND I CANT RELY ON ANYBODY NOW.

 

YUE, THATS ONE REASON YOU DIDNT SEE ME ON MSN BECAUSE I REALLY HAVEN'T GOT THE MOOD TO CHAT. SORRY AND I MADE YOU WORRY ABOUT MY SAFETY HERE. ANYWAY, CHINESE NEWYEAR IS COMING SHORTLY , HAPPY NEW YEAR, AND THANK YOU FOR YOUR CUTE T-SHIRT MY MUM TOOK A PHOTO AND IT LOOKS GREAT !